Confession one
Melissa Gijsbers

The prompts I had were:
Victim: Preacher
Accomplice: Indian contortionist
Evidence: Photo from CCTV
Scene of the Crime: Empty room
Murder Weapon: Poison
In Pocket: Ticket from a parking garage

Here’s my story:
​
Comfortfoodies.com/winter-comfort-beef-stew/
27 August 2008

Today I want to share with you my recipe for the perfect winter comfort beef stew. This is a recipe that my mother used to make and it was always a hit at our church pot luck dinners.

The beauty of this meal is that you can keep it on the stove and keep adding to it, so you’ll never run out of stew. Or you can freeze it in meal size portions to use at a later date or give it to someone in need.

Growing up, we always had a supply of Winter Comfort Beef Stew in the freezer as mum would have them ready for family and friends who came down with the winter flu, or who had fallen on hard times.

This supply was especially useful in the winter of 1993. I had just discovered that my brother was being abused by our local pastor. He was a slimy individual, yet no one believed my brother when he reported the abuse. Pastor Frank always talked his way out of any allegations and had a gift of turning things around to make everyone think the kid was making it all up.

Pastor Frank would drive my brother out to the local paid car park, and park in quiet corner, do what he came to do, then drop my brother home again. Even the discovery of the parking ticket in his pocket didn’t change people’s minds that Pastor Frank was anything less than a good, upstanding citizen.

I digress. In the winter of 1993, Pastor Frank came down with pneumonia. My mother had her supply of frozen stew, so I saw my chance. I offered to take a meal to Pastor Frank and my best friend, Arjun, came with me.

We went to his home with the meal mum had already heated, and a packet of Rat Sac at the ready. As always, we waved to the CCTV camera Pastor Frank had at the door. We were just another of a long stream of visitors while he was unwell.

We served him stew laced with Rat Sac, and chatted to him while he ate. When he was done, we washed the dishes and said good bye.

The Rat Sac must have done its job as we heard the next day that Pastor Frank was dead. He had been found in the spare room by Mrs Maguire, the parish secretary, and it was reported that he had been poisoned.

My brother was spared further abuse at the hands of Pastor Frank, and so were any other number of young boys. I have no regrets and have never been caught.
​
Now, here is the recipe for my mum’s Winter Comfort Beef Stew.

I got the idea for the format for this confession from various Facebook writing groups where they talk about confessions being included in food blogs as no one reads the story before the recipe!

* This blog post originally appeared on Melissa's website here. 

Confession Two

Megan Higginson

​These were my prompts:

1) Evil accomplice: A guy dressed as Ronald McDonald being arrested.
2) The hapless victim: Weird, sleazy guy with a ‘Who’s Your Daddy?’ necklace.
3) Found in someone’s pocket: A $12 docket from the drycleaners for a coat.
4) Pieces of evidence: Photo of a burning car in a paddock with five boys with coats and masks on standing in front of it holding hands.
5) The murder weapon: A blue ring octopus.
6) Scene of the crime: a dingy motel. 

Here's my story.

​Macca’s Deathbed Murder Confession
Yeah! Hi. My name is Macca. Well, that’s my nickname ‘cause my last name’s McDonald. Can’t really tell ya my first name ‘cause I forgots it. ‘Cause stuff happened, and the psych reckons it’s because I went through some sorta trauma as a kid. But, she’s wrong. They all be wrong.

            How do I know? ‘Cause my Think Melon be bringing stuff back. Memories, as I lay here dying, they be coming back. Like them puzzle pieces which get lost underneath the couch for the longest of times and then some decides to move the couch and pick up them puzzle pieces. But, at the moment, they be like a pile of memories. No order. No real substance. Blurred by bits of dust and time. Maybe talking it out will help slot it all into place. So, I guess I should start at the beginning.

            I grew up in a small country town. One supermarket. One doctor. And one dingy hotel. We had to catch a bus to go to a school in the next town. Though, once, we did have a school. It burnt down and no one built it again. Haha. Some reason I always laughed about that.

            I lived with my crazy uncle Ronald. He had wild red hair and worked at a crappy restaurant downtown. He let me do whatever I wanted. My mates would always hang out at my house. We liked to get dressed up in weird masks and go burn stuff. My uncle didn’t mind. Look. He even took a picture of me and my mates burning some idiot’s car.            

Oh! I remember. It wasn’t just some random’s car. It was some sleazebag’s car. And that guys name was… Oh. Ooo. His name was Bryce... Bryce Rickford. He always wore an unbuttoned jacket with the shirt hanging open to show his chest. Weedy guy he was. And he wore this big thick chain around his neck with a ‘Who’s Your Daddy’ pendent.

For some reason, Uncle Ronald really didn’t like Bryce. Bryce lived at the motel. He’d lived there for ages. Then one night Uncle Ronald asked me and my mates if me wanted to get dressed up and go for a drive to burn something. We did. We burned the sleaze bags car.

By the sounds of things, that sleazebag Bryce had come into the restaurant and had been horrible to just about everyone, and no one did nothin’. And he did it a bunch of times. Uncle Ronald had had enough. He kept sayin’ ‘He’s going to pay for what he did.’ Don’t think burning the car would do much. I already had a better idea. But, burning the car was fun. Uncle took that photo. I even remember the smell of the burning metal and the petrol fumes and the clinking of the metal as it expanded, and the flames licking at the sky. Beautiful. And right after that photo was taken Uncle Ronald yelling at us to ‘Run!’ ‘cause we were in a field of long dry grass and the fire had started to spread. So funny.

When we got back, all of us were sworn to secrecy. We made a pact never to tell anyone about what had happened, ever. Then, when me mates had gone home, Uncle Ronald sent me to the drycleaner, to get my coat cleaned. As I left my bedroom, I made sure Bro was okay. I had a special job for him.

Oh, yeah. I forgot to tell you. Day before the car burning, I’d gone with my class to the beach. Snagged myself a blue ring octopus and popped him in a jar. Deadly little buggers they are. Just one has enough poison to kill ten adults. Called him B.R.O. Blue Ring Octopus. Get it. Haha.

The day after the car burning, I rode me bike to the Motel. Took Bro with me. Staked out the place and made sure Bryce was out. Then I convinced the receptionist I was Bryce’s nephew from the city. Told him a sob story of how I’d travelled all this way and was so tired, and could I wait for my uncle in his room. Sucker let me in. I snooped a bit. Moved the odd thing around so Bryce would come lookin’ for 'the person in his place.' Then I hid in his wardrobe. Yuk. Smelled of Old Spice and Brylcreem.  

Then I heard the door open, and Bryce chuck the keys on the table. And then he swore. I could hear him stomping around the place, cursing and swearing. My heart was pounding. I was smiling. The time was near. The bedroom door squeaked open.

‘Come out. Come out, wherever you are, my little 'nephew'.’

​Man. You could even hear the air quotation marks.

I slowed my breathing. Screwed of the lid of the jar. I got ready. Bryce flung opened the wardrobe doors. I yelled, ‘Time’s up!’ and flung the salt water and Bro right in that sleaze bags face. You should’ve seen the look on his face as he fell back on his bed. Then the wailing started.

Last I saw of Bryce Rickford he was screaming in agony. Goodbye, Bro! You did well.

Then I left and played with my friends at the park. It was fun.  ​

Here's my story:

3rd of January 1981 in the Big Banana Caravan park in Yorkeys Knob.

I began, during a period of convalescence following a serious crochet injury, to write letters to prisoners. I came across this site online that asked people to write to felons serving long term sentences in prison in the US. Perhaps I was drawn to the sense of danger – that is, communicating so intimately with dangerous criminals while at a safe distance. There are certain subjects you’re not allowed to talk about, and it is strongly advised that you use a false name and PO box, for obvious reasons.

One man drew me in more than the others- Albert Fruit. I call him Bertie. It wasn’t romantic at first, but there was something tortured and soulful in the poetry he sent me, the simple, childlike drawings of life behind bars… He told me how he’d been framed by his employer, a rich bitch named Marcie Crump. Crump lived in an opulent inner-city penthouse inherited from her late father, the sock baron, Marmaduke Crump. Bertie worked the machines at one of her family’s huge sock warehouses in Seattle and then after hours doing odd jobs at her penthouse. She lived surrounded by cats and the penthouse was crammed to the ceiling with junk she hoarded and smelt like cat piss.

That was 1978, the year of the terrible exploding socks incidents- you may have heard of it. Fifty innocent people were left footless after her socks suddenly exploded on their feet (a result of the chemical compound used to create their new anti-odour fibre being activated through friction- in gym socks!) and she and her fancy lawyers plotted to blame Bertie. They claimed that he’d doused the socks with radioactive explosive foot deodorant bought from roadside vendors in Turkmenistan. Bertie’s never even been to Turkmenistan! But poor Bertie was representing himself against a team of the best lawyers money could buy, and, well… He’s not very smart, my Bertie.

Anyway, through our letters we got closer and closer until he proposed to me. I didn’t hesitate. I know people won’t understand, but love has no barriers, not distance, not bars- so I bought an airfare to the US, and we married at the high security prison with the guards as witnesses. I returned to Australia, empty and lovesick, but my Bertie had a stroke of luck. Some bunch of do-gooders that do theatre therapy with prisoners visited his block. They did this crazy play about the importance of keeping up good eating habits while behind bars, with each dressed up as a different type of food, dancing about on stage. Bertie, who has always had a streak of the thespian in him, asked one of the actors if he could have a go in his banana suit. He said the moment he donned that suit, he felt a sense of freedom he’d never felt- he frolicked, twirled and danced, to the delight of the other inmates. He’s got a natural charisma, my Bertie.

The escape was actually accidental. The real banana man suffered a concussion backstage (slipped on an actual banana skin, would you believe!) and was knocked cold. Nobody saw, though, but my Bertie, and he wandered out to get help, only to be gathered up with the theatre therapists and ushered out one set of doors, then another, then another… Well, Bertie just kept his head down, and shuffled along and out to freedom! With the help of some contacts he’d made on the inside, Bertie got a fake passport and borrowed money to travel to Australia. We met up in Yorkey’s knob near Cairns, and, under a new identity, my darling Bertie got a job as the face of the Big Banana Caravan Park, entertaining the children. The kids just loved him!

For a while things went brilliantly, then one day we went out for drinks (hobnobbing it up!) at a posh resort at Port Douglas, and who should be sipping cocktails in the lounge but that rich bitch Marcie Crump- wearing a fur, even in the middle of summer, and with her cats, poor little things, all shackled strapped down in a plush velvet pram she pushed around. (Bertie hates people who wear fur, even in cold weather. He’s a real animal lover- that’s one of the things I love about him so much). She looked right at us- right at my Bertie- and an evil smirk stretched across her mutton-done-up-as-lamb over-painted face. I was the one who decided what we needed to do…she would talk for certain.

Bertie, though, wanted to try a softer approach. Back when he used to work for her in her penthouse, he overheard a lot of conversations between her and the stakeholders of the company- dodgy things- illegal things. His idea was just to blackmail her- send her an anonymous letter to her hotel room.  Unfortunately, He wrote a return address on the back. (He’s not the smartest, my Bertie). She wrote back and let us know that, apparently, using hair dye on your cats’ fur and sneaking champagne bottles into the neighbour’s wheelie bins do not count as a strong basis for effective blackmail. Bertie was despondent- he couldn’t go back behind bars, so he decided to follow my plan.

She was going back to Seattle in a week’s time, so we had to move fast. Marcie, apparently, loved health spas. I dressed up as a glamourous cosmetician and knocked on her hotel room door, announcing with excitement that she had won a weekend at the most expensive health spa in Australia- the Pig Pen. Although skeptical, she was finally won over when I told her that the free offer was not made to the common public, but only to a very exclusive clientele. I also assured her that all the products used were tested rigorously on as many helpless, endangered animals as possible. She was sold. 

The address of the spa was a pig farm just down the road from the caravan park. We arrived in advance on foot through the bush so we wouldn’t be seen driving there and back. She was confused when she arrived with her pram full of cats- no upmarket salon or army of staff waiting to fuss on her. From behind the barn leapt Bertie- heroic and fearsome! What a man! “You evil, cat-tormenting liar!” he cried and before she could reply or defend herself, he stuffed the banana costume over her head and tossed her into the pig pen, where the pigs (raised solely on a diet a ripe, tropical bananas) swarmed over her, turning her quickly to a gruesome fruit salad. We quickly unshackled her poor moggies from the pram and used an old bicycle in the shed to ride back to the caravan park, beaming all the way.

There was just one hitch. As she struggled to free herself from the banana costume, out of the pocket of her fur coat fell a piece of paper. It was a return ticked to the US. Bertie took it thinking how nice it would be for us to celebrate with a little holiday. Unfortunately, that was the final bit of evidence that got us caught.
​
 He’s not that smart, my Bertie. 

Thanks for reading our stories. I hope you enjoyed them. If you'd like to read more, in the Search bar, type in 'stories.'

Melissa Gijsbers also runs Junior Writer's Club for young writers. Coming up she will be holding a virtual, and an age appropriate, version of Confessions of a  murder. Please feel free to contact her is you have children who may be interested.   

Have fun by creating a short story by using a story starter and then change the mood. You'll surprise yourself and it's lots of fun. We used this during our last Zoomed writer's group, Dribbles and Scribbles and we roared with laughter at the results. And we all certainly need a laugh these days. 

First of all we chose a Story Starter from a great list of story starters from Sally Odgers book, How to be an Awesome Author.  I told everyone to just have some fun and play (thanks, Jen Storer for this advice in your Scribbles Academy) and write a short story. I gave everyone 20 minutes and we were off. For the first time in a long time we all felt we had some head space to write. Let's face it, 2020 has been a roller coaster. 

At the end of twenty minutes we took turns in reading out what we had come up with. The were hoots and howls of laughter, gasps, comparisons to the feel of certain books. In other words, fun. 

We then moved on to the workshop. Mood. 

For this we headed over to LitCharts.com and read through what they had to say about mood.  

'Mood Definition:

What is mood? Here’s a quick and simple definition:
The mood of a piece of writing is its general atmosphere or emotional complexion—in short, the array of feelings the work evokes in the reader. Every aspect of a piece of writing can influence its mood, from the setting and the imagery to the author's word choice and tone. For instance, a story that begins "It was a dark and stormy night" will probably have an overall dark, ominous, or suspenseful mood.' LitCharts.com

We've looked at creating mood in all different ways many times before in our writer's group. (Some we've even blogged about.) 

• Setting
• Imagery
• Tone
• Diction
• Genre and Plot

However, this time I decided to do something different so that we had the opportunity to combine all the skills we had learned previously. So, after reading through what mood was all about, I announced to the group we were now going to use our story we had written earlier and change the mood. One thing which was not mentioned but many of us did anyway, we changed what our character focused on as we had already work shopped this a while ago. 

So here are our stories so you can see the difference.

Megan:
Mrs Perry’s garden was overgrown with thistles. Mood 1.

Mrs Perry’s garden was overgrown with thistles. They twisted and twined themselves around bushes, spread across the garden, strangling various plants as it went. It spread across the grass and up and over the washing line. It hung there like a many fingered skeleton grasping at what looked like the remnants of an old shirt and was now a piece of faded cloth. An icy breeze grasped at the material and finally ripped it from the thistles grasp and the remnants of the shirt was tossed and carried past grimy windows and up into the stormy sky.

Rory froze as he caught sight of the cloth, his hand on the rickety old gate. His feet felt as if they were cemented to the spot and his breath came in small gasps. He could feel his head starting to spin. No! He did not want to be here. He did not want to go into Mrs Perry’s and apologise to her for his ball going through her window. He did not want to apolgise for breaking the garden statue when he snuck into her yard to retrieve it. She. Freaked. Him. Out. He caught himself and started some deep breathes.

In. Hold. Out. Repeat.

‘Hey! Rory!’ a familiar voice called.

Rory jumped. Billy Dickenson, his best mate, laughed. Gah! He was the reason why he was here, and he got off scot free. So not fair.

Rory scowled. ‘What?’

‘Good luck. You’re gonna’ need it.’ And with that Billy sped off down the street, his laughter carrying on the breeze.

Rory’s hand shook. The gate groaned as he pushed it open. He stepped onto the path and started towards the front door. Overgrown tree branches grabbed his hair, his jumper. Spider webs clung to his face. He swore to cover his rising panic.

The sky overhead darkened and lightening flashed just as he reached to knock on the front door. The door squeaked open and there stood old Mrs Perry. Tall and thin wearing an old moth eaten dressing gown and what looked once were fluffy pink slippers but were now a strange grey colour. Her thin grey hair stuck up in every direction. Mrs Perry stared down at him.

‘I-I’ve come to do some gardening,’ he stammered.

‘Come in, Rory,’ rasped Mrs Perry. ‘I’ve been expecting you.’
 
 Mrs Perry’s garden was overgrown with thistles. Mood 2.

Mrs Perry’s garden was overgrown with thistles. They jumped and hopped over the rose bushes in full bloom, encircled the lilac tree, and hugged the camellias.  A gentle breeze blew through the garden and carried the scent of lilacs and roses past Rory. Rory was rooted to the spot. One hand on the rickety front garden gate. The other clutching two sunset roses.    

His face felt warm. From the beautiful spring day; and from other things. His guts felt like a gazillion lizards were leaping around in there. He sighed. Though he did not want to go into Old Mrs Perry’s and apologise to her for his ball going through her window, and he did not want to apolgise for breaking the garden statue when he snuck into her yard to retrieve it, he did want to meet ‘Her’.  

‘Hey! Rory!’ The voice of his best mate, Billy Dickinson, jerked him out of his dream state.

Rory jumped. Billy Dickinson, his best mate, laughed. Gah! He was the reason why he was here, and he got off scot free. At least he wouldn't be around to interfere. 

Billy scowled. ‘What?’

‘Good luck. You’re gonna’ need it.’ And with that Billy sped off down the street, his laughter carrying on the breeze.

Rory’s hand shook. The gate groaned as he opened it. That’s going to need some oil, he thought. He stepped onto the path and started towards the front door. A blackbird began to sing its song. Ahhh! What a romantic touch. For a moment he stood transfixed and then he remembered who was waiting for him. He smoothed down his hair and pushed his way forward through overgrown tree branches. They’ll need pruning back. He wiped off the spider webs which clung to his face as he reached the front door. I'll have to get rid of them. 

Sunlight burst through the many branches as he reached to knock on the front door. The door squeaked open and there stood old Mrs Perry wearing an old moth eaten dressing gown and what looked once were fluffy pink slippers but were now a strange grey colour. Her thin hair stuck up in every direction.

Mrs Perry stared down at him and grunted, ‘What do you want?’

The sunlight had penetrated into the gloom of the house and lit up the person standing behind Old Mrs Perry. Young Mrs Perry. All gorgeousness and sunlight with an air of melancholy about her, and it was actually her he had come to see. Perhaps, after all these months, he would be the one to put a smile on her face.
​  
‘I-I’ve come to do some gardening,’ he stammered, as he stuck out his hand holding the roses.

Melissa Gijsbers
Grapes were usually green, weren’t they. Mood 1.

Grapes were usually green, weren’t they. Or purple. Never orange. Orange was reserved for oranges and mandarins. Come to think of it, none of the fruit in Old Mrs Marshall’s fruit bowl was the colour it was supposed to be… and none of the grown ups seemed to notice, or care.

The grown ups sat happily nibbling at orange grapes, purple cheese, and bright blue nuts, along with sipping a wine in a green that looked suspiciously like it had been made from brussels sprouts.

The children thought the wine should also have been orange as it was made from grapes, but it was definitely brussels sprouts green.

Even the orange juice that was given to the children was a strange colour. It was a pale purple rather than orange. None of the children wanted to touch the food or drink offered. They felt as though a spell had been cast over the house somehow, missing the children and only landing on the gown ups, who kept telling the children not to be rude and to eat what was offered to them.
 
Mood 2:

‘Grapes were usually green, weren’t they?’ Joey whispered.

‘I guess,’ Emma looked at the strange array of food before them.’

‘Nothing is what it’s meant to be,’ whispered Callum.

‘I only eat red Food!’ declared Molly, standing as tall as her 4-year-old, one-meter body would allow. ‘I might get a tomato,’ she hissed to the others, ‘or maybe a red frog,’ The other kids rolled her eyes and wished her luck.

‘Sit down Molly,’ her mother said. She was sipping puke green wine. ‘Don’t be rude.’

‘But I only eat red food,’ Molly said. She sat down, the fight going out of her. She pushed the strange coloured food around her plate. There was no way she was going to drink the ‘orange’ juice that was actually purple.
Emma wrapped her arm around her little sister.

‘It’s OK,’ she said, ‘You don’t have to eat it.’

‘There’s a pot over there,’ Joey whispered, ‘we can empty the juice into it. I’m sure the plant will like it.’ The other children nodded enthusiastically. ‘Watch my back.’
​
Joey moved across the floor, slowly, careful not to get the attention of any of the grown ups and emptied the first cup of juice into the plant pot.

Ester de Boer

Dear Clara, why did you steal my kayak. Mood 1.

Dear Clara,
why did you steal my kayak?
We were three hours away from camp by river, but now I have to climb down on foot, and the terrain is tough! Tree branches grab at my hair and clothes, and under the canopy of the jungle, I lose all sense of direction, not to mention the insects… did I mention the insects, Clara?

Dear Clara,
Seriously, my insect repellent? It’s one thing to nick the boat, but to leave me, stranded in the jungle at the mercy of Argentine killer ants and what the heck? Is that a spider? No way! Clara! I’m covered in bites and they burn and itch like crazy and there are spiders…SPIDERS, CLARA! Big, scary buggers with legs that resemble gnarly, hairy-knuckled fingers dangling above my head, creeping into my backpack. I’m terrified one’s going to creep into my swag and get me in my sleep.

Dear Clara,
Why did you steal my sleeping bag and replace it in my backpack with a sack full of rare, spiked, poisonous Bayara leaves? I put my hand in to pull it out and now the skin is peeling from my fingers and it’s making me insane. I know we’ve had our ups and downs. I feel like you’ve never forgiven me for that incident with Deidre. How many times do I have to tell you that she was teaching me an ancient Mayan yoga technique? Oh my god I feel sick… and these ant bites are kind of swelling and ohhh my stomach… I’m just going to have to wrap myself in the swag and sleep best I can…

Dear Clara,
I can’t find the medicine case. It had the antiseptic cream, Phenergan, anti-malarial tablets… I think these insect bites are beginning to fester. I want you to know that, no matter what I’ve done, it was always you, Clara.

Dear Clara,
It’s raining. I’ve scrunched myself up in  the swag for the night, but the rain finds places to trickle in. My hands have gone an alarming shade of green where I made contact with the bayara leaves… I’m not sure now if I’m still wet or just sweating profusely. Babe, I missed you so much.

Dear Clara,
Couldn’t you at least have left the Imodium?

Dear Clara,
Why did you dig a large pit in the ground, fill it with sharp objects and poisonous snakes and cover it with palm fronds? In my delirium, I stumbled right into it and now I am lying, impaled, waiting to be finished off by what looks very like a Guatemalan spitting asp.

Dear…. Clara……..     Why???
 
 
Mood 2:

Dear Clara,
why did you steal my kayak?
The walk down from the mountain is slower, much slower, than the trip by river, but I know how to bide my time, Clara.

Dear Clara,
I have discovered more things missing. You really have been a nasty girl, but I am patient… I am suffering, of course. That is what you wanted, to make me pay. That’s what you do, Cara, but I forgive you.

Dear Clara,
I could hardly believe you would be so petty, so spiteful, but it’s part of what I have always told you about yourself. Sometimes you harm yourself and blame me, but this is the proof. You took my sleeping bag and set a deadly trap to poison me? You made me very angry, Clara. But I’ve calmed now and am ready for us to work things out. You’re confused and don’t know yourself- you have a lot of trust issues and this is your way of showing it,
But I’m patient, Clara. I’m very patient.

Dear Clara,
I barely slept, with the stinging of the insects and the driving rain and mud. I’d ask why you do these irrational things- steal, sabotage our relationship, try to control the situation, but I don’t believe you know yourself.
But I do, Clara. Which is why you need me- why you can’t survive without me- I wish you could understand the torment it puts me thorough when you do these things, when you make me so angry, when you make me do things that hurt you.
It’s because I love you Clara.

Dear Clara,
You took the medicines
You really are trying to kill me, aren’t you? Yes I’m hurt and angry, but I forgive you Clara. you’re a sick person.
But when I get back down to you, we can work it all out. I’ll be setting a few new rules, Clara, but know that they’re all for your good.

Dear Clara,
I can’t wait for us to be back together. The jungle has cleared and I can even see you, frantic, buzzing back and forth around the cabin- I’m having a little laugh to myself. Did you discover that the car doesn’t start Clara? I could be there is less than an hour, but it’s such a pleasure to watch you, my little Clara. And I am patient, very patient…

Have fun and let me know how you find this exercise. And maybe you may know some kids who may like to try this out, just for fun. 

When you have lived with fear your whole life, it takes years to learn a new way of living, and thinking. I’m not talking about the type of fear that is healthy, the one that keeps you safe; the fear that you can make friends with. I’m talking about the type of fear that is crippling and holds you back from living an amazing life.   
I’ve lived with fear my whole life. In the past few years, I’ve learned how to overcome the crippling fear that held me back and I’m living a life that I only dreamed about. Recently, I had fear rise up. A new fear. I had no idea where it came from, and, to tell you the truth, I had no idea what I was supposed to do with it.      
 
This fear was different, and it was to do with the Overcoming Fear, Living Courageously  workshops I’ve talked about. I kept putting them off. I wasn’t even researching. I stopped reading the book I had bought to help me prepare these workshops. I procrastinated. And I’m not one to procrastinate. I don’t put things off… normally. I was getting so frustrated with it all. I was ready to pack the whole idea away. I don’t need to have these workshops; I reasoned to myself.   

I wondered what on earth was going on with me. I tried to push through and shove how I was feeling down. That behaviour only brought everything to a grinding halt… again. I finally decided to put half an hour a day to finish reading the book I was mainly using for research. A small step towards my goal. During my reading I came across a story about a boy who was anxious about a play he was in. When asked why he was so anxious he replied, ‘This is really important to me. I’m afraid to stuff it up.’ 

Until recent years, I’d lived with fear controlling me my whole life, but now it doesn’t. I’ve learned to manage my emotions and not be controlled by them. So, this whole fear of completing and running these Overcoming Fear workshops was nuts to me. When I read this story, it resonated within me and I realised why I couldn’t move forward.  These workshops are super important to me and I don’t  want to stuff them up.  

However, I want to share what I’ve learned with others, children and adults alike. I want to be able to empower children, and adults, to overcome fear and live a courageous life. And, I also realised something else. I would've wanted to run these workshops even without my book, ‘Raymund and the Fear Monster’. The book has only served as a catalyst towards me planning these workshops. 
   
Now that I realise this, I can get on with creating these workshops. I have my ‘why’. I won’t suppress how I feel. I look at it, recognise the emotion, name it, and then deal with the emotion appropriately. And I will take it one small step at a time so I don’t overwhelm myself.     

Here is a quote from the book, The Opposite of Worry by Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D.  

It is by doing this I will get these workshops done, one step at a time. 
​
I want to encourage you today, to look fear in the face and take a step towards it. One small step. Allow yourself time to feel what you are feeling. And, when you are ready, take another step. For some, it may be a just taking public transport for the first time by themselves. For others, it may be standing up to speak for two minutes in front of people you don’t know.  
​
My challenge is for you to do the above exercise this week. As for me, I’ll try Facebook Live.

​Let me know how you go.      
Until next time,  
Live courageous.  

My first Facebook Live video.

Below: My second Facebook Live a week later. 

Week 3: Think about what you're thinking about.

Disclaimer: This is not intended for clinical use. These videos and blog post are dealing with the general symptoms of fear and anxiety. It's me sharing my personal experiences and what I've learned. If necessary, seek professional help.

​Adam Wallace likes to march to the beat of his own drum. Hilariously funny, I managed to get him serious for a few heartbeats. 

Megan: Hellooooo, Adam. Are you there?
 
Adam: Ready when you are!
 
Megan: Let's dive right on in, shall we?
 
Adam: Let's do it!
 
Megan: In your life before writing fulltime, what did you do?
 
Adam: Haha! Wow! We really are straight into it!
 
Megan: Oh, yeah!

Adam: Okay, well, to cut a long story shortish sort of, I had about twenty jobs, but the main things after school were not writing for ten years and becoming an engineer! Yes, I am a numbers nerd! I did that for a while, then got a Primary Teaching Diploma of Education or grad dip, or dipping sauce, I don't know, something that let me teach, and then from there I morphed into writing children's books!
I must also warn you I am currently working on a book called Weird, so my answers may get a little crazy!
 
Megan: Thanks for the warning. I’m now prepared for the answer to my next question. How exactly did  morphing from engineer to primary school teaching to children's book author look like?
 
Adam: Haha well I guess it was a cross between Mission Impossible and X-Men and the Incredible Hulk, who is my favourite Avenger, and I actually had a pair of Hulk jeans when I was a kid. I was missing the muscles, but I had the jeans.

Anyhoo, I would do a flow chart to show you, but don't know how, so basically, I was bored as an engineer, didn't have motivation to go further with it as a career, and wanted to work with kids, or play golf. I started writing and what came naturally was rhyming children's stories. I loooooooved it, and started writing every day.

And also bought The Artist's Way, which I recommend to everyone in the world, no matter what you do.
From there I went back to Uni and did my teaching degree, while still engineering, and on my rounds and in my assignments, I wrote and did rhymes and one assignment was to write and illustrate a kid's book, and I loved it. I put more into that than any assignment I had ever done, and I still have that book today! So that writing led to more writing and more submissions and many rejections and finally books!
​
That last sentence was 8 years in one sentence. And people say I waffle on!
 
Megan: I love The Artists Way by Julia Cameron. It was an essential part for me diving into the world of illustration. Julia has certainly made an impact across the globe in the wold of creativity. And it's that whole ripple effect too.

Adam: Yes, I love the ripple effect! The butterfly effect freaks me out a little, but the ripple effect is amazing. Especially in creative fields, where this leads to that leads to something else. Even with the book I am working on now, I will write something that will spark something else and suddenly I am doing things that never crossed my mind in the initial draft.
​
I think a creative career is like that as well. When you get started, things happen. If you sit around, nothing does.

​Megan: I love how a spark can leads to another thing, and that leads to something unexpected and a complete surprise.

So, it took you eight years to break into the industry. And I noticed you’ve self-published, partner published, and traditionally published. Can you talk us through how you made the decision to self-publish, partner publish, and traditional publish? Was it depending on the individual book? Or were other factors involved?
 
Adam: Hmmmm. Okay. Well there are a few answers to this. I will try and not waffle ... mmmmm, waffles.

I initially self-published because I was working with kids and reading them my stories and was feeling confident they were liking them (except for the time I read a story to two kids and halfway through they got up and walked off!!!).

Megan: Kids don't try and be polite about how they feel about something. They tell you straight up. Honesty. Love it.
 
Adam: Definitely! And as creative people, yes men are no good to us at all! We need to know if something isn't working, or we can head down the wrong path for a long time. Not all advice is going to be right for what we want, but at least it needs to be honest.

Adam: However, publishers weren't as keen on the stories as the kids were, and I built up around 150 rejections over 5 years.

That helped me decide to self-publish to 1) Actually have a book rather than just hundreds of stories on my computer and 2) Show the publishers there was a market for these stories. So, I borrowed a little cash off Dad and got an illustrator - you may have heard of him ... Heath McKenzie? He's done some stuff since.

I printed 2000 copies of Better Out Than In and set about selling them. I sold the 2000 in around a year or so, which was awesome, and then I heard a whisper that a publisher was looking to start doing children's books. This was JoJo Publishing. I submitted, they accepted, and they offered me either a traditional or a partner publishing option. I went for Partner. We redid Better Out Than In, and then I did another 7 books with JoJo’s. It didn't end so well, but they really gave me a start when no one else would, and I am forever grateful to them for giving me that chance!
 
While all this was going on, I was still submitting to other publishers, but they weren't interested, so I also started self-publishing some little how to draw books, which went offfffff! They are now the backbone of my writing business, and so I continue to self-publish them because they are going so well. I have also done freelance books, basically pay for hire work, for Hinkler Books and now for Sourcebooks in the USA, which has also been amazing!

With traditional publishing, the choice to do that was made when Paul Collins at Ford St took me on, and again I am so grateful to him for that as well. I met Paul, and after a while he came to me with a style of book he wanted, and so I wrote and illustrated that for him and we were away!
 
Megan: You’ve certainly come a long way since your JoJo publishing days. Your book, How to Catch an Easter Bunny was read out at Trump’s first Easter Egg Roll in 2017. You’ve also hit the New York Best Seller list several times, and some of your books like, Spark, have received awards. Can you explain what these experiences were like?

Adam: Oh wow, all of those things were AMAZING and bizarre and exciting. Especially the Easter Egg Roll thing. I had no idea it had even happened, and to this day don't know how it did! I have had different reactions. The Easter thing was laughing and telling everyone, the bestseller list was so awesome and, in a way, a nice justification that I was on the right track.

For a long time, I had been told that my books only sold because I was selling them, so for these books to reach the Bestseller list without me doing anything aside from writing them was really nice and made me feel like I was actually writing books that worked, regardless of if I was there telling people about them and jumping around like a crazy person.

Spark was amazing. I actually burst into tears with that one, because it was dedicated to my grandmother, who was also a writer, and who actually had some of her stories illustrated by Mirka Moira! So, Spark was inspired by an experience I had with her, and was totally written for her and in a way with her, so for us to be recognised for our book together was incredible. And I can't thank Andrew Plant enough for his paintings/illustrations that brought the book to life.
 
Megan: I love Spark, and yes. The illustrations are so amazing and evocative, and to have Spark which is so important to you to be recognized in that way is fabulous. Did these accolades make your next manuscript easily accepted, or do you still get the odd rejection letter?

Adam: Haha! No! I get rejection letters still! What I have found is that the accolades give me more exposure, which is incredible, and so it gets a bit of a foot in the door and gets me out of the slush pile (sometimes). But the publishers still have to like what I write, and it still has to fit with their vision and mission. So, I still get rejections!

But rejections can also be opportunities! The How to Draw books, for example. They were rejected all around and have now sold over 70,000 copies! Or ones I did with JoJos that got rejected everywhere else, did really well and in fact are still going well now! So, it is definitely worth persisting, especially if you really love something you have written.
 
Megan: And that is what is comes down to, doesn’t it? Doing what you love. Believing in your work. And persisting. And you’ve certainly shown all that in bucket loads. There is so many ways to get your work out into the world now.  

Adam: It totally comes down to that. I mean, sometimes we still have to take a look and realise that perhaps a certain piece of work just isn't good enough, but, also, sometimes a rejection doesn't mean that at all. It just means it either needs work or it isn't the right time or place for that story.

Megan: At KidLitVic-meet the publishers last year, you were described as the publishers’ author. You have the qualities as an author that they love to see. What qualities are they?
 
Adam: Oh, yes! That was a funny experience, and really nice and made me blush at the same time. Well, the things Paul was talking about at KidLit were the fact that I am prepared to put in the slog. The glory is great, but you have to do the slog, get out there and show kids your work, and let them get to know you as a person as well as a book making guy.
​
Social media and computer stuff is great, but for me face-to-face is the best! I do school visits and go to craft markets and look, to be honest, I love being with the kids, it gives me energy and inspiration, and I can fully be myself. Also, I think I am quick. I can write and draw quickly and with quality, so deadlines are very rarely an issue. I like to get my work in fast so that there is then time to work on it with the publisher and make it as awesome as possible for the kids, who are the only ones who matter in the end, I believe.

Megan: You are so right. We need to be able to stand back from our work and cast a critical eye over it and see if what they say has merit, and we need to put in the hard slog and persist.

And your comment about school visits is a nice segue into my next question. Besides writing disgustingly funny stories, you make visits to schools around Melbourne. You just said that you ‘love author visits because I love being with the kids, it gives me energy, and I can fully be myself." 

What do you think makes your author visits memorable? And what advice would you give authors considering author visits?
 
Adam: I really want to ride on a Segway ... just sayin'.

Well, I think what makes my visits memorable are that I bring hiiiiiigh energy, and really try and engage with the kids. My visits have morphed like the Hulk over the years, and now I have found a nice mix that works well. There is a lot of interaction with the kids, they get to tell stories and use writing techniques that I use, and we also draw pictures and have lots of laughs.

And I think that probably the main thing is that what I do is fun, and it is achievable, and with kids, especially those who find reading, writing, and drawing a chore, or too hard, or think they can't do it, that is a massive key; letting them see they can have fun and come out of it with something they never thought they could achieve. It's awesome for them and it's awesome and a massive buzz for me as well.
 
In terms of advice for other authors, pretty much the biggest thing is be yourself. I jump around and get a little crazy and really try and wind up the kids, but if you aren’t someone that feels comfortable doing that sort of thing, don't do it! Be you! That is what should be coming across in your books, and also in your presentations, or workshops. If you are you, and comfortable in that, it will come across and that will relax the kids as well.
 
And the other thing would be to get the kids involved. Don't just get up and talk at them for an hour. I did that at the start and bored myself and the kids to tears.
 
Megan: I love doing author visits and having fun with the kids. I’m not a live wire like yourself. But, I think that if they can see you are passionate about what you do, they’ll catch that too. And I apparently get really fired up about story writing.
 
Adam: Haha! That is awesome!!! You getting fired up about it will get them fired up too ... maybe not all of them, but that's okay as well. And you're exactly right about the passion. Fun and energy can be all sorts of different things, it doesn't have to be right out there. Some people have props, some sing songs, some tell stories, some are passionate about writing, and some are really low key but the kids have a ball and love what they hear and do.
 
I think connecting with the kids is the key. Even fun without connection will bore them in the end.

Megan: So true. Nearly finished, Adam.

I love hearing about the courageous acts of others. And I’m not talking about saving someone or being heroic. I’m talking about feeling afraid of doing something and doing it anyway. Do you have a personal story of courage? Something that you felt you had to do but felt so freaking afraid you thought you’d pee your pants, but you did it anyway.
 
Adam: Oh man, well there was the time I needed to pee my pants, and I was scared that if I did I would get into trouble, and then I did it anyway ... and I got into trouble. But aside from that!

Oh man, it happens all the time! In terms of physically, I have bungy jumped and done sky-diving and things like that which were terrifying. But there are also things like speaking in front of hundreds of people when I am naturally shy, or sending off my first story, or doing my first interview, or being open and honest even though I know it will cause conflict.

I get scared all the time, professionally and personally, but I love the saying that courage isn't the absence of fear, but feeling it and doing it anyway, and I try and live by that. I got a tattoo of the word YES, because I want to be someone who, even if they're scared, says YES and goes for it anyway.

Fear has its place, don't get me wrong, fear is a safety mechanism, but if it controls us and stops us doing what we love or being who we want to be, then we have to overcome it and say YES!
 
Megan: I agree with 100% with your statement, Adam. And I live by that motto too. ‘Courage is not the absence of fear but feeling it and doing it anyway.’ Here’s to saying, ‘YES!’
 
Adam: Absolutely!
 
Megan: Finally, three fun facts about you.
 
Three Fun Facts about Adam:
Haha! Oh, wow, okay ...

1. My left big toe is 6cm long.
2. My sister is one of the very top pole fitness competitors in the world
3. I love horror movies, and when I was a kid I named my dog Krueger, after Freddie Krueger!
   

 
Megan: Yay! Brilliant. Thanks so much for the chat today, Adam. You have been so generous with your time and sharing your experiences with others. It’s been a blast.
 
Adam: My pleasure, thanks so much for letting me play!

Just for fun: 
Megan: One of my top posts for 2017 was 5 Ways Zombies Can Inspire You. Adam wrote the book, Zombie Inspiration, which I read and ultimately blogged about what I gained from that book. Check it out if you'd like, and be inspired to say, 'Yes!' 

Places on the internet to find Adam:
​
Website: www.adam-wallace-books.com

Facebook: www.facebook.com/wallysbooks

Twitter: www.twitter.com/wallysbooks

YouTube: www.youtube.com/awallace100

Are you feeling a little lost in your life? Are you just going day to day doing what you think that you are meant to be doing with no insight as to why, or where you should be focusing your attention?

You’re blogging, or not blogging, you’re on social media, you’re writing stories that are in your head, you are told to build an author platform and have no idea what it means, you’ve joined a critique group. Maybe it's doing other things in your life. Maybe you are running around doing ‘stuff’ and are losing heart. Something is wrong. I’m here to tell you that there is a fix. It is easy, and at the same time hard to find what to do about it. If you are ready for a change, keep on reading.   

In 2016, I felt that I was missing something from my author journey. I thought that I knew where I was heading and what I was doing, and then I felt like I was missing something. Shortly after, I came across a concept that has cleared the muddy waters that I was traversing, and I now have clear sailing ahead. What is this concept?

It’s important to know your why. Your why impacts your what, and your how. In other words, if you know why you are doing what you are doing, it will impact what you are doing, and how you are going to do it.
I hope that this will help you to clarify your own ‘why’. Pre-warning: It will take some time, soul searching, looking deep within yourself, and answering some questions, But, I promise you it will be worth it.
​
Here is the video by comedian Michael Jr. that sparked it all. Please watch it before continuing. 

You’re back. Yay!

It was about the power of knowing your ‘why.’ In the video, he shows the audience a clip from a different event. Michael had met an audience member who was a singer and music teacher. He asked this man to sing the beginning from “Amazing Grace.” As expected, he sang it flawlessly note for note in an amazing deep baritone.  

Michael asked the man to sing the same song again, but this time to think about a hypothetical situation of a family member being released from prison. This man’s second performance rocked me and gave me chills. His voice rang out in that auditorium with passion and thankfulness. He created his own notes. He let himself fly with so much feeling and emotion it had people on their feet. Michael Jr. finished with, “When you know your ‘why’ then your ‘what’ has more impact, because you’re working towards your purpose.”

In this article in Forbes magazine written by Margie Warrell she asks four questions. (I have paraphrased some parts)
1. ‘What makes you come alive? ‘Connect with what you’re passionate about, know that when you focus your attention on endeavours that put a fire in your belly you can find your way forward and it will impact how you do things.’ 

2. What are your innate strengths? ‘What are the things you’ve always been good at (sometimes wondering why others find it so hard?)’ 

3. Where do you add the greatest value?
Knowing ‘your greatest strengths and where you can add the most value—through the application of your education, skills, knowledge and experience—can help you focus on the opportunities, roles and career paths where you are most likely to succeed and therefore find the greatest sense of accomplishment and contribution. Do not undervalue your strengths, skills and the expertise we naturally acquire over time.’ 

How can use your interests, strengths, abilities, interests, and experiences?
 
​​​ 4. ‘How will you measure your life? 
‘People who don’t stand for something, can easily fall for anything. Deciding how you want to measure your life means making a stand for something and then living your life in alignment with it. Ultimately, living with purpose means focusing on things that matter most.’

I have personally found that I now take on challenges even though I know that it is going to stretch me. Sometimes, I do it because I know it is going to stretch me. It inspires me to keep going forward, but at the same time it gives me a way forward. It is because I know why, and now my why impacts my what and my how. 
 
So, how do you put all this together?

1. Take a piece of paper and pen, or on the computer, and write down all the things that put a fire in your belly (and I don’t mean the chilli or curry you are planning on for dinner), the things that you are passionate about. I graded mine from ‘really important’ to ‘OMG I HAVE to do this’. You can use, 1-10. Important to Majorly important. Whatever works for you. 

2. Next, write down all your strengths. Don’t be modest here. No one is going to see this. 

3. Think of your education, your skills, your knowledge, your interests, and (what impacted me most personally) your experiences. Write it all down. 

4. Now the big one. How will you measure your life? What are the things that you are going to focus on? What gives you purpose? 

5. Take your time and don’t rush it. It is a process. You will find that all what you have written down will intersect at some point. You will have your light bulb moment.  
 
Doing this myself has given me renewed focus in the stories I write, as well as how I want to be known as an author. It has even given me new focus for my blog posts on my website for the year.
 
I am sure that if you stop and think for a few moments, you can name some authors that: love history and write historical fiction; others have lived through some various horrible experiences, they’ve come out the other side and now share about what they have learnt in their stories, school visits, and workshops; another may have a love of zombies and what you can learn from them, and that’s what they focus on in their stories, blogs etc. 
 
Well, you get the picture.
 
I hope that this has inspired you, and encouraged you on your journey. Are you ready to find your, ‘why’?
 
I’d loved to hear from you and how this post has impacted your life.

Today I’m chatting with children’s author, Renee Price. Renee is the author of the Digby Fixit series, founder of Create-it-kids, musician, performer, and puppeteer (though she informs me she is still working on that). Renee is an inspiration to me. Nothing holds her back from achieving her goals. She just goes for it. 

Megan: Hello, Renee. 

Renee: Hi Megan, I've managed to be child-free for about 20 or so minutes. Hoping that's enough time! 
 
Megan: We might have to do it over a couple of days. The interviews usually take about an hour to an hour and a half. How quick can you type? 
 
Renee: Oh sorry! Did I miss that piece of info? I'll see how I go. 
 
Megan: Shall we dive right on in then? 
 
Renee: Sounds good 
 
Megan: I’ve been watching your journey over the past three years with great fascination. I’ve followed your journey as you’ve self-published not one, but two picture books that seem to be doing really well and kids are loving them. Digby’s Moon Mission came out in 2014, and you followed it up with Digby and the Yodelayhee… Who? in 2017.  
​
1. Can you tell me why you decided to publish these books yourself, and how did you go about it?  
 
2. Can you tell me what your process was like to create Digby’s Moon Mission and the second book, Digby and the Yodelayhee… Who? 

Renee: Thanks, Megan! It's definitely been a challenging, yet rewarding journey. 1. I’d submitted stories to traditional publishers for about two years with either polite rejections or no response at all. After drafting Digby’s Moon Mission, I had the story professionally assessed and edited.

I also had a wonderful mentor who had pursued self-publishing for some of her own work. My mentor and illustrator saw great promise in the story and character concept. I didn’t want Digby to become another manuscript tossed aside or overlooked by trade publishers. He was different. He needed to share his voice. The best way to ensure this was to self-publish. I researched for 12 months, the processes, challenges, pitfalls, and benefits involved with creating a trade-quality children’s book.
 
Megan: And you certainly have produced quality books to be proud of. You ended up going with Taadaa Books. What was it like to work with Anil and Orzan from Taadaa Books?
 
 
Renee: Your question two: The process started by commissioning an illustrator, and I found the amazing Anil through a Facebook author/illustrator page. I then worked with my editor through many revisions of the first book - once the manuscript was ready, Anil and I worked on the storyboard together then her and her husband, Ozan (Tadaa Book) worked their magic - Anil with illustrations and Ozan with design.

Anil and Ozan are fabulous - so incredibly helpful with all aspects of the self-publishing process. I couldn't have done it without their guidance, and the source of information, Tania, my mentor provided.

Tadaa Book were familiar with the printing company, Ingram Spark, which is who I used for Digby's Moon Mission. They are a print-on-demand service, so it was good to know I could print as many or as little copies as needed. They offer online distribution as well, and I also sourced my own distributor here in Australia, Dennis Jones & Assoc.
 
Megan: It sounds like you have a wonderful team around you to guide you through the process. I don't think a lot of people realise how much hard work goes into creating a picture book.
 
Renee: This is true! It takes a village to make a book!... or something like that. Haha! My second book followed a similar production path, except that this time, I printed offshore rather than through Ingram Spark. Quality and pricing were much better.
 
Megan: You have the whole performer package going on too. You sing, write your own music, even do puppetry. Does music influence you when you write your books? 

Renee: I do! I wanted to offer a unique 'service' to help market my books, and I've had a life-long dream of being a children's performer - I just love creating for kids. I love that I can combine my passions - writing stories and songs, and utilise these to communicate, interact with, and engage young children.

Music plays a significant part in my writing process, and I was so excited to publish Digby and the Yodelayhee Who? as it brings my two writing loves together. I have some other manuscripts in the works where music is involved.

Music plays a significant part in my writing process, and I was so excited to publish Digby and the Yodelayhee Who? as it brings my two writing loves together. I have some other manuscripts in the works where music is involved.
 
I love uniting the two artforms — I feel they credit each other so well — especially in early childhood, language development, imagination and creativity can really flow.

Although I'm still working on refining the puppetry skills! Haha
 
Megan: I’ve seen the video you did with Debra Tidball with her new book, The Scared Book. It was great.
You are also the founder of Create It Kids as well as (and I’m quoting from your website here) ‘a qualified early childhood teacher, music educator, children’s author and performer, with 13 years collective experience in early childhood education, writing and entertainment. What response have you had to your performances and books?  
 
Renee: Thank you! It was a delight to work with Debra on the video - such a fabulous opportunity and so fun!
 
Megan: I’ve also seen other videos of you performing with some kids. I say ‘with’ because they were all in there dancing around, totally involved with your singing and music.
 
Renee: My performances are where I really feel at home — I love how interactive they are, and I can be totally crazy, and it's a good thing. The kids respond well to the high energy and interactive nature of the performances, and it leaves a lasting impression — on them, and me. Schools and preschools have been really happy with what I offer for their kids/students. I hope to broaden the audience next year with shows further from home.
 
The response I've had from my work has been so positive and incredibly encouraging. It's a big risk being an indie author, so when your book babies are out in world, you just hope they are well-received. My books have had quality reviews on sites such as CBCA Reading Time, Boom Books, Kids' Book Review etc., and continue to do well. My second book was recently listed on the NSW Premier's Reading Challenge which was wonderful.
 
Megan: Wow! Congratulations. I did see your second book listed on the reading challenge. I’m sure there was some happy dancing around the house for that. Your self-published book on a list like that.
 
Renee: Oh, yes! I was thrilled! Such a huge achievement (and great reassurance to have recognition such as this).

Megan: On your website you share that both you and your eldest son and have a rare, genetic condition, called Cleidocranial Dysplasia. Can you tell what sort of obstacles you’ve overcome to get to where you are today with your writing and performing?
 
Renee: I spent a lot of time in hospital as a child — either attending specialist appts, having tests, surgery, treating fractures - reading, writing and music were my escapes and comfort. Having physical limitations such as short height, weak bones, and muscles, I couldn't do a lot of the 'normal' physical activities kids could, so I found ways to overcomes this through creative involvement - music lessons, theatre performance, and writing. In a way, my condition has helped pave the way, and I love everything about what I do.

The trickiest part though, has been the last 10-12 years where I've gradually lost my hearing (due to the bone fragility of my condition). I now have moderate-severe hearing loss, so without hearing aids, I'm lost!

Thankfully, because of the hearing aids, I can still enjoy my music, though it does have its challenges in the recording environment (and even with hearing aids, I still miss some sounds). Does have its bonuses though when I'm being annoyed by certain sounds — I just take them out to get some peace!
 
Megan: So often it is those very things that we think are obstacles are the very means to pave the way towards something we may never have discovered about ourselves.
 
Renee: So true!
 
Megan: This year was the second year that Create It Kids has donated money for Jeans for Genes Day which supports research into genetic diseases, birth defects and cancers at Children’s Medical Research Institute (CMRI). How important is to you that you can use your author and performing platform to be able to get the word out there, and hopefully one day see medical breakthrough in these areas?
 
Renee: I often feel overwhelmed with people… people's stories and challenges — being so close to home for me, and having something I can use to help increase awareness mean so much, I just hope if my tiny level of involvement can reach even just one new person, it will create a ripple effect.

Sorry - the wording there is all weird. Couldn't express it very well!

Megan: That's okay. I thought something was wrong. Sometimes when something is close to our hearts it can be hard to express, no matter how good with words we are.
 
Renee: Hit the nail on the head there.
 
Megan: And I’m sure that what you’re doing will have a long-lasting effect on many people.
 
Renee: Thank you - so many creatives have had long-lasting effects on me. I love this industry.
 
Megan: You blog for Just Write for Kids. Last year in June you wrote a blog post entitled, This message will self-destruct. http://www.justkidslit.com/this-message-will-self-destruct/  .  

In this blog post you said, ‘And now, here I am, doing it all over again. Fearing the opinions of others. Comparing myself and my ‘failures’ to others, seemingly endless success. So much wasted energy!
You know what?! I’m done. Done with fear. I’ve spent the better half of my life living with it, now it’s time to lay it to rest. I don’t expect this to be an easy journey, but I’m tired of the alternative. Tired of enduring the ‘F’ word. I know deep down I’m one of the awesome ones… we all are! It’s time to kick fear to the curb and let courage step in.’

I love that last part, ‘It’s time to kick fear to the curb and let courage step in.’

What differences have you seen in your life since you’ve made that commitment to yourself?
 
Renee: You know, it's enlightening to sit and re-read this passage (thank you). It's a commitment that, I will be honest, has softened at times, but I think the difference is since making it  I'm now more aware of when the 'F' word starts creeping in, and I know how to manage it better — I'm in a more confident space, and I'm able to zoom out and look at the bigger picture when I'm feeling doubtful or a little anxious about where things are headed, what I'm up to etc.

I also have a newfound outlook that anything is achievable if we want it badly enough — we just have to work hard to get there, and never miss an opportunity for growth.
 
Megan: That is so true. It’s amazing what we can achieve if we know how to address fear, look it in the eye, and say, ‘Get out of my way! I’m doing this.’
 
What next for you? Will there be another Digby Fixit?
 
Renee: That's a great question! I'm working on some more Digby stories; however, I want to spend more time on 'non-Digby' work so that I can continue building my body of work, and submitting to traditional publishers. I'm unsure I will self-publish again, so that is the biggest question regarding Digby books — but I will continue to spread the word of his stories with performances, perhaps scriptwriting as well — I'd love to see his stories on the big stage.
 
Megan: That would be fabulous. Any last words of advice to your fellow creatives?
 
 
Renee: Dream big, work hard!
 
Megan: Great words of advice.

Three fun facts about Renee:
 
My favourite colour is purple.
I'm the eldest of five in my family - all of us are musical.
The first concert I ever went to was John Farnham when I was eight-years-old. 
 
 
Megan: Thanks for taking time out to chat with me today, Renee, and being willing to share your journey with us.
 
Renee: Thank you so much for the awesome interview - I love the personal nature of your questions - it really gives insight into the 'person' behind the creator.
It's been my pleasure to share. I'm really grateful for the opportunity.
 
Megan: Bye, bye for now. I can’t wait to meet you in person at KidLitVic in Melbourne next year.
 
Renee: Thanks again! xx
 
About Renee:  Renee is a children’s author, songwriter and performer, from Newcastle, New South Wales. She began writing in 2010 after teaching in early childhood and primary school settings for eight years.
 
In 2012, she held the role of Editorial Coordinator at Newcastle’s Child magazine, working within various aspects of the publishing industry, including reviews of children’s books and music, and composing articles for the publication.
 
In December 2014, Renee released her first picture book; Digby’s Moon Mission, through her brand, Create It Kids, and performs a dramatisation of the story for preschool and young primary school audiences, incorporating theatre, song, storytelling and puppetry. Renee has developed a series from her first publication, with Digby’s second book due for early 2017 release.
 
She will continue adapting each story for dramatisation.

Renee is a current member of CBCA NSW and Newcastle Sub-Branch, Australian Society of Authors and Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators.

Where to find Renee on social media, links to places she blogs, and her website.
Social media - www.facebook.com/DigbyFixit & www.facebook.com/CreateItKids 
Twitter handle @CreateItKids

Websites - www.createitkids.com.au & www.digbyfixit.com 
Some of her songs for kids are recorded here. 
Renee's Digby performance promo video link. 
She is also on the team at www.justkidslit.com and is an admin for the Just Write For Kids Facebook group.
 
YouTube clip of Digby and the Yodelayhee… Who?

If you enjoyed this post feel free to like and share. 
And if you want to keep up-to-date, you can subscribe to my newsletter. ​

Megan: Hello Melissa.
 
Melissa: Hi!
 
Megan: I have watched your journey for the last couple of years and have been blown away by your tenacity in the face of so many obstacles. However, even though times have been tough, you haven’t given up on your dreams of writing and publishing your books.

Can you share a little about your journey as a writer, and how being a single parent with two chronically ill teenage boys have impacted your writing journey?
 
Melissa: I have always loved writing. It's something that I could do that I was good at, that was mine. My siblings are very musical, and were heavily involved when we were teenagers, but it wasn't my thing. When I was in high school, I won some writing awards, but being an author wasn't considered an 'acceptable' career path and I was encouraged to look at other things.

Life got in the way for a while - I ran my own business for over 9 years, and was a blogger since before it was popular, so I still wrote, but not creative writing.

When my youngest son turned 7, I was told I had to return to work, so I closed down my business, and discovered creative writing again.

In 2012, I joined the 12x12 in 12 and Chapter Book Challenges, and things have gone from there. Through the Chapter Book Challenge, I discovered that I really like writing in that format.

Four years ago, my younger son came down with Glandular Fever, and that turned into Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, last Easter, my older son was diagnosed with Complex Regional Pain Syndrome.

It's a hard road, but many things we've been through have sparked ideas for stories, though when things are really hard, it gets overwhelming, and sometimes it can be hard finding the energy to write.

I've been a single parent for nearly 12 years now, and I often go away to my favourite cafe and spend a blissful couple of hours writing, but I haven't been able to do that lately with my older son in and out of hospital.

Although we do have a reputation around the hospital, all the staff ask me how my latest book is going.

Megan: That is amazing. You’re single. You work. You're looking after your teenage boys, taking them to hospital and doctors’ visits, and you also run writing workshops for kids.
​
How do you find time to write, besides the blissful couple of hours here and there? 

Melissa: I do my best to fit it in around everything! I carry my iPad with me most of the time so I can add to stories when I have a minute. I have found the Scrivener app useful for writing snippets. I also have a notebook with me at all times so I can jot down things if an idea hits me.

For editing, I print out my manuscript and carry it with me so I can edit on the go rather than having to make sure I have my laptop or iPad with me
 
Megan: Wow! You certainly make sure that you make the most of every minute that you possibly can.

You’ve self-published two books. Where did the ideas come from for those books?
 
Melissa: The first book, Swallow Me Now, came about because my kids were being bullied, and they wanted a story that had a realistic ending, rather than one where the bully and victim become best friends, or the bully magically goes to another school. It's based on experiences I had as a missionary kid struggling to fit in, and experiences my kids had of being bullied.
​
The second book, 321 Done, was inspired by something my son did. My older son is a speedcuber, this means he solves the Rubik's cube very, very fast. Shortly after his brother was diagnosed with ME/CFS, he did a fundraiser at his school to raise money and awareness about ME/CFS to see how many times he could solve a cube in half an hour. This book is a fictionalised version of this event.

Megan: I’ve seen your older son solve those cubes. His fingers are like speed lightening. How have the books been received? And has anything about that surprised you?
 
Melissa: The books have been well received. The biggest surprise is how many parents & kids have told me how much the books have helped them - they have enjoyed the strategies for bullying in Swallow Me Now.
And how much the cubing community has embraced 321 Done - it was the first book that features a speedcuber that has been published.
The biggest surprise with my books is how much people are enjoying my story.
 
Megan: It must feel wonderful for your books to have been so well received. Especially all the hard work you put into it, as you also crowdfunded to get them published too.
So, what has kept you following your dreams despite the difficulties?
 
Melissa: Writing is something I feel I have to do. It's something that excites me. Sharing my love of writing and books gives me a buzz. In the midst of all the difficulties, it's something that feeds me.
I often have people ask what I'm doing to look after myself, I reply that I write. They often look at me as if I'm crazy, but it's what I do!
 
Megan: I totally get it.
 
Melissa: So many people don't!
 
Megan: You also have a new blog, Diary of a Chronic Mum. Can you tell me about it, and why you started that blog?
 
Melissa: I started it so that we could follow our own journey and see how far we've come, as well as sharing some of the strategies we use to cope.

I hope that it will help others in a similar situation, as well as being a way to help me cope - writing about it all!

Sometimes, in the midst of a difficult situation, you forget about how much things change and how far you’ve actually come.
 
Megan: So very true. It’s really wonderful that you can use your own experiences to help others.

You have a new book coming out, Lizzy’s Dragon with Stone Table Books. Can you share how that opportunity came about?
 
Melissa: That came about as a result of a friend reading Swallow Me Now! He got a job as an editor at Stone Table Books and they were looking for middle grade books and he asked if I wrote fantasy. I said I'd give it a go. We came up with the idea for a water breathing dragon and the rest, as they say, is history!
 
Megan: I love the fact that this opportunity came about because of a book you had self-published, and your friend was able to get a taste of writing style, and like it enough to ask you to write for them.

So, tell me. What is Lizzy’s Dragon about? 

Melissa: Lizzy is a girl who really loves reptiles and wants a lizard as a pet, her parents won't let her. Her annoying little brother, Joey, seems to get what he wants! One day, she finds a strange looking egg. When it hatches, Lizzy finds the most unusual lizard she has ever seen.
 
Megan: Sounds fantastic. Where is Lizzy’s Dragon set?
 
Melissa: Somewhere in country Australia during a drought. There is no town name mentioned, so it could be anywhere.
 
Megan: So many fantasy stories are set overseas in places like England and Scotland. Why did you pick Australia for the setting?
 
Melissa: When we came up with the idea for a water dragon, we thought of bushfires! I lived in country Victoria during the 1983 Ash Wednesday fires and my Dad was a forester and fought the fires. It's something I was familiar with, so setting in Australia was an obvious choice for this book. Plus, as you say, there aren't many fantasy stories set in Australia.
 
Megan: So, it sounds like you worked closely with the editor on this book. How was that experience compared to writing your previous books and having total control over the end product?
 
Melissa: I really enjoyed the process. I find I do my best work when I'm working closely with an editor. The publisher found an amazing illustrator who brought my words to life.
 
Megan: A good editor is wonderful. They really do help you bring your story into a whole other realm don’t they?

Melissa: They do. They are able to see things that I missed, and help to turn a good story into an amazing story.

Megan: Do you have any current projects you are working on?

Melissa: My 4 year old nephew has asked me to write him a story about a boy and a unicorn! I am also working on a couple of stories for adults, not sure if they will be novels or novellas.
It's fun playing around with different formats and genre.
 
Megan: It certainly is. I love just writing whatever story comes in my head. I think about the audience when I rewrite.

Well, it sounds like you have plenty of stories to be working on. I look forward to seeing what you come up with. Good luck on the launch of Lizzy’s Dragon.

When and where will Lizzy’s Dragon be available?
 
Melissa: Lizzy's Dragon is available now through Stone Table Books and on Amazon, or request your favourite bookshop or library stock it.

Megan: That sounds great. Well, I think that about wraps it up. Did you have anything else you want to add?
 
Melissa: For anyone who thinks they don't have time - if writing is what you really want to do, then go for it. Even if you can only get the occasional 10 minutes here or there. You don't have to write for hours every day to be an author. I don't, and I'm making my dreams come true.
 
Megan: And that is the crux of it. No excuses! Just go for your dreams and make everything that seems like an obstacle and opportunity. An opportunity for growth.  
Thank you so much for your time today, Melissa. I'm sure that your story will inspire a lot of people.
 
Melissa: Thank you for the interview and the opportunity.
 
Three fun Facts about Melissa:

1. I can recite the first Grug book - it was sent to us in a missionary barrel in 1984 and we memorised it!
2. I don't drink coffee, I can't stand the taste. Instead I drink chai tea, and take my own tea bags where ever I go - much to the embarrassment of my kids!
3. The first trophy I ever won was for a writing competition when I was in Year 11. For many years, it was my only trophy, until I won a business award in 2009.

​
Melissa Gijsbers lives in the South Eastern suburbs of Melbourne with her two teenage sons and their pet blue tongue lizard. She is an avid reader and writer and runs a group for writers at her local library. She currently has three books available for purchase and is looking forward to adding to this list. You can find out more about Melissa at www.melissagijsbers.com and www.melissawrites.com.au

Follow the blog tour:
Just Write For Kids: Character Q & A: Interview with Lizzy's Dragon, Bubbles.

Tales to Tell Me: Lizzy’s Dragon by Melissa Gijsbers.

Do you want a writer's group activity with a difference? An activity that will stretch you in ways you wouldn't believe? Then you may want to try this interesting, and fun activity that will have you painting, and then writing with music. 

Recently I ran a weekend art workshop in Canberra in which I used a synesthetic (Synesthesia) approach to teaching the elements of drawing through responding to sound.
Since our little writers’ huddle is on the artsy side I thought I would adapt it to the art of the written word.

We warmed up with some basic drawing and painting exercises and experiments, and I scattered a variety of art materials all over the table for us to choose from, and yes it was merry chaos!

Those of you who know a bit about art history would be familiar with Kandinsky. He was a Russian painter who is credited as having produced some of the first truly abstract paintings. One of the inspirations for the way he painted was an amazing ability called synaesthesia: Kandinsky could actually hear the colours he painted with!

It’s an enviable gift for any artist, but I think we all have a bit of it, and it comes out in our everyday expressions, for example “Feeling blue”, “black humour”, “green with envy” or “white noise” for the colours. Or how about texture, with expressions like “gravelly” or “velvety” to describe a voice?

I selected four different pieces of music, each with very different mood, texture, variations of dynamic and pitch, and we responded to each piece visually, describing the sounds into visual representations.

After sharing our artworks, I replayed the four pieces. This time, we responded both to the music and our visual representations through any kind of short, free-form writing.

Just as music and art have texture, rhythm, pitch/tone and tempo, so does writing. What was very interesting was how writing in direct response to music actually influenced our individual writing styles.

(To make this work properly, it’s important not to be given information about the music, use music with recognisable words or be able to see any video clips as they can obviously influence the outcome. The only recognisable piece is Flight of the Bumblebee, but I am happy to say that none of us drew a beehive!)
​

Ester:
Stomp break dance with me
Boom! BANG! explode collide
Whiiiirl… BANG! fly……. land
c-runch—lift, glide… drop
slide
stomp
stop.

Megan:
Winding roads.
Wind roaring.
Rolling waves.
Rollicking. Jumping.
Dancing. Joyful carousing.
Off to the markets.
Full of life. Laughter.
Slowly the day ends.
The sun sets into the horizon.
Ready for a new day.

Ester:
Silken smoke drifts through the lattice, twists and writhes in the perfumed air… Its phantom fingers reach across the empty room and,
As we touch, it grasps, encircles around like cords,
Impossible to unbind.

Megan: 
Sadness. Love is lost.
All is lost.
There is no hope.
All is gone.
 
The voices all tell me
it is all gone.
But is it really?
I’m more determined to
live for life, for life
each day.

Each day slips by.
How will we live it?
Lose a day?
Gain some life?
 
Like a leaf blowing in the wind
blown by the storms of life?
Or rising like an eagle
to fly far above
all?

Ester:
Pip! Pop!
Pebbles drop
Upon the pond, plipipipipop!
Spit! Spat! Raindrops drip-drop... dripipipipip!
Making puddles that splip and splap!

Megan:
Drip. Drip. Pelting helter skelter.
Flit. Flutter.
Streaking here.
Streaking there.
Hip. Hop.
Jump.

Ester:
Ssssshht-t  BEEP  Spaceport 9 canyouhearmeoverandout BEEP… ssshhhhht -t-t cracklesshhhhhtt-t-t-t. . …   .    . …     .no noise.      .    .  .  U N K N O W N     w h i t e r o u n d m e s s a g e .. .   . number 9 receiving…. re ceiving… . re ceding. . .. .     re  ce d i  n g      … into  the white round   void    that   is       s  i  I e n c e… silent  .. sssilent  over-over-over-over                     and      out.

Megan: 
Rush.
It builds.
Terror. Mehem.
A cold fist in my belly.
 
Hiding.
The dark.
Rest. Finally?
No!
It comes.
Rushing. Stumbling.
Fear traces its icy fingers down my back.
It says, ‘I will get you!’
 
Safe? Am I?
No!
Running again.
This thing is pursuing me.
Will I get away…this time?
Tripping. Stumbling.
Long arms reach for me.
It’s happened.
The thing I feared the most.
Caught.

Megan's Two Cents
​I found this a fascinating exercise to do. I was amazed at who much the music influenced what we painted, and not only what we wrote, but the language, the tempo, even the theme. 

Let me know if you give this a try and how you go.  

You say your stories are character driven. Who are they inspired by? 
I don’t think my characters are inspired by any person or ‘persons’ in particular.  They’re a mixture of characters who I’ve met, or taught, even aspects of my family. There’s a bit of me in each one I suspect. 
 
How do you road test any new characters you create?
I showed a couple to my mother earlier on. She was appalled, particularly when it came to Mr Chicken. I knew at that point I was on to something. I have an aversion to ‘cute’. I’m simply not interested in cute books, not that I pay too much attention to children’s books in any case.  However, I admit I am a bit of a romantic at heart, hence the underlying good heartedness of my characters and the relationships between them…. or most of them. I never road test characters with kids. Every kid is different and ultimately a writer or artist needs to rely on their instincts. Well I do anyway.

I had the privilege to attend one of your talks at my local library in Gippsland. During your talk, you said that you write from the heart. Does what come out ever surprise you? If yes, can you give an example?  
Yes. I’ve surprised myself on a few occasions. The first time was when, about twenty years ago I was asked to give a lecture to fine art and graphic art students at my old art school (Caulfield Tech. now Monash University) I’d only written a couple of books at that point and some students asked me to select a few pages and read them from my first book ‘Old Tom’.  My voice cracked at a certain spot and I realised that I’d strayed into autobiography. The students picked it up as well.  

Your illustrations are so loose and immediate. What do you do to create that effect?
It’s just how I draw.  The drawings evolve on the page. I work hard to make it look effortless. I feel I’ve failed if a drawing looks laboured. I’ve always had better eyes than talent. Which means I’m nowhere near as good as I wish I were. My limitations all too often stare back at me from the page. 

That can be a healthy thing for an artist. To keep striving for ones own idea of perfection even though you know it’s all too often unattainable.  My primal goal when drawing is to get to the essence of the subject, be it a character or a building.

How long does it take you to complete an illustration? 
It varies. Sometimes a drawing works straight off and it looks fresh and spontaneous and it’s done. However, there’s usually a spoil sport part or illustration where I have to battle to get it right….and then disguise the considerable effort along the way.  Then it might take a day or days to finish.  Often in this case I rip it up and start again, in a sort of frenzy because by then the deadline is looming. 
 
I noticed in your books that you include well known buildings in the illustrations. I’m aware that you have a passionate interest in architecture and history. How important is it for illustrators to create from the heart? 
I’ve no idea what’s in anyone else’s head, I just know that the enjoyment and satisfaction I get from creating these books comes from creating a genuine sense of place. An authentic sense of the atmosphere in London, Paris, or Rome. 
 
You are working on your art in its various forms all the time. How do you feed your creativity?
I read a lot. Books about architecture, History, Baroque, Georgian, Tudor. English or German architecture interests me most. I read history books often. Biographies too. At the moment, I’m reading David Marr’s biography of Patrick White.   As well as a history of London.  I travel quite a bit too. I’ve been to London over thirty times.

Horrible Harriet has been made into a stage show. How did that come about?
I was approached by the producers who were, in consultation with me, offered the stage rights by my publishers.  I had some input but stepped back after a point. I have learnt not to get too emotionally involved in the translation into other mediums of my books or characters. 

What is it like to see your work interpreted in that way?
Unnerving and strange. My ‘children’ have left home.  It’s ultimately flattering in spite of a degree of anxiety I inevitably feel. 
 
I’ve watched a lot of interviews of you. Some show you going into schools and talking to the kids, engaging with them, and the students totally engrossed in every word, especially when it comes to the drawing segment where you show them how to draw Old Tom. What do you like most about school visits? 
I enjoy engaging kids, especially when I sense that they are loosening up and creating for the pleasure of it.  It’s satisfying too when kids who may not be used to drawing or writing creatively end up being completely engaged. 
 
You are the Australian Children’s Laureate for 2016/2017. What does that mean for you?
It’s been a great honour and is and has been a wonderful experience.

What would you like to see change in the schools of Australia, and why?
Every school needs a Library and school Librarian.  Misguided schools are, or have already done away with their school Library. I’ve heard dreadful stories about Librarians retiring or being put in excess and the school library, carefully built up over many years completely emptied with books thrown out or delivered to op shops.   Libraries, good ones are carefully calibrated to the needs of the students and teachers at the particular school. They are more than just books. And I’d like to see art and music as a ‘definite’ on the primary school curriculum. 

What’s next for you? 
Mr Chicken’s next adventure:  ‘Mr Chicken all over Australia’ 
 
Would you tell us ‘Three Fun Facts’ about yourself?
Well, here’s just one…. I’m allergic to cats.

You can find more information about Leigh Hobbs on his website, about his role as the 2016-2017 Children's Laureate here, and his books and toys (you can buy Horrible Harriet, and Mr Chicken soft toys) through Allen and Unwin. 

Fear can hold you back from so many things, but especially from following your dreams and becoming all who you were meant to be. How can you face those fears and move forward in your life?

‘I would love to write and illustrate my own picture books.’ This was something that I said to myself a number of years ago when my kids were small. I don’t know what it is but so many authors and illustrators discover/rediscover a love of picture books when they are reading them to children. Either their own children or someone else’s.  

For me, I always wrote but never called myself a writer until recently. I always drew, but never progressed beyond feeling that my pictures were terrible. The thing is, they were not good, but I could not break through that ugly stage to get them to be any better. So I stagnated in both my writing and my drawing. 

Four years ago I had a breakthrough with my writing. I started taking courses and investing in my passion for writing and telling stories. I still drew and painted but never seriously. It couldn't get any better than I was, and I couldn’t get past it, especially when it came to drawing people. I compared myself to others. I listened to the little voice, the critic on my shoulder, who had said I’d never be good enough; I’d never measure up so why bother?

Why bother indeed? Because, like with my writing, I couldn’t leave it alone; I had to pick up a pen and draw. I had to try to capture a moment, tell a story. It was a part of me as far back as I can remember. That feeling was always there but never acknowledged. My father, Pop and Nan were all artists. 

​Though I did not have much to do with my Pop, and my Nan died when I was a baby, their art was always around, inspiring me that maybe someday I could do the same. My parents separated and later divorced when I was 13. And, as my father was violent, we had to go into hiding. Though in years later I did meet up with my dad and have a small amount to do with him, it was not a lot and he no longer was doing any art. He has since passed away.

My big breakthrough with both my art and my writing (which I thought I was all good with) came when I picked up a copy of, The Artists Way by Julia Cameron at the beginning of this year. It was first published in 1992 and, as Ali Stewart has so aptly put it in her recent blog post, Three Important Insights from The Artists Way, ‘with umpteen reprints, several spinoffs, and numerous nips, tucks, and facelifts, the perennial title continues to unstick stuck creatives.’ It has certainly unstuck me.

I first heard Valerie Khoo on the podcast, So You Want to be a Writer, talk about the book, The Artists Way at the beginning of the year. Next thing she was going on ‘artist dates, learning the mysterious rope art formally known as macramé, Japanese Book Binding, and going to musicals. This opened a new world to her, and she seemed so much happier. Then, I read a blog post that mentioned The Artists Way, and the same week walked into a second-hand store, and there, in a stack of books lay The Artists Way. Its spine was highlighted to me and my gaze immediately drawn to it. Curious about the fuss, and figuring God had his hand in this somehow, I took it home and began my journey of healing, acceptance, and discovering a sense of play. 

So, what was it that unstuck me and helped me overcome my fears? A lot of hard work and commitment for the full 12 weeks of The Artists Way program, and committed to stretching and challenging myself ever since, that’s what. Each week of The Artists Way program, especially at the beginning, you have to work through questions and activities to find what is keeping you stuck. I was amazed how the very act of WRITING an experience down and seeing it black and white could unblock something within. Do it! It will amaze, shock, and surprise you.
 
For me, it was a combination of having my classmates laugh at my stories. I was a shy kid with very poor self-esteem. Looking back now I can see that my stories were funny. At high school, I would write stories straight out of left field and have a totally different take on the assignment. This also caused my classmates to burst into laughter and for me to wish I could just sink into the floor and disappear. 

My art was different. I had one great art teacher for three terms in year eight. But, the rest of the time my art teachers were interested in Abstract Art which I hated. I wanted to learn to draw and paint nature, people, and animals. As I said at the beginning, I couldn’t get past the ‘yuk’ stage. I didn’t know how.

About five years ago I got hold of Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain by Betty Edwards. ​This was my first breakthrough. Going through the exercises and then trying to draw later I was amazed at the difference. As you can see below, there is a remarkable distinction between the two drawings. 

However, I still stagnated — until this year and The Artists Way. 
​
In The Artists Way there is a section of affirmations. One spoke to me and has made one of the biggest impacts. I can nurture my artist. Up to this point, because I felt my artwork was no good, I didn’t need to invest time and/or money on courses or good materials. Oh. My. Goodness. The change that happened when I gave myself permission to invest in good quality paints, paint brushes, paper, liners, as well as online courses was incredible.
 
So, what did I do after The Artists Way?

I drew. I painted. I continued to take myself on Artists Dates. I spoke with illustrators like Giuseppe Poli and Katrin Dreiling and picked their brains. You can read what they told me here and here. With Giuseppe’s encouragement, I joined the 52 Week Facebook Illustration Challenge and started putting up my work online, not just in that group but everywhere on my social media pages.

My illustrations aren’t great. But, the very act of having to come up with a new piece every week is a wonderful discipline. These were my Artist Dates as well as going to the art store for art supplies. And I can see the improvement already. I often sit in amazement of what I just completed. I also signed up with Skillshare and started taking Nina Rycroft’s illustration courses, as well as any other courses that I felt could help me learn how to use the different mediums.  

For me, putting up my art on public display is about conquering my fear of not being good enough and feeling afraid of never measuring up. I have changed my thinking. I no longer compare myself to my friend Ester, who is an amazing artist, and an incredible illustrator. Nor do I compare me to anyone else. I am me. I look at the world differently to anyone else. I am discovering my own style. And, most of all, I am having fun. I experiment all the time. I now compare myself to myself and how far I have come in such a short time.  

And do you know what has surprised me the most? This release, this freedom I have found in my art has found its way into my writing. I play with words. I have fun with them. I have fun in my stories. I especially noticed this in the Sci-fi/fantasy novel I just finished. I had an absolutely thrilling time writing the last part of my novel. Each time I sat down I felt exhilarated.

As for my art, I have signed up to take Nina Rycroft’s illustration Masterclass e-course. And my friend Ester is taking it with me. We’ll be doing it together. How cool is that?
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So, what about you? What can you do to become all that you can be and start understanding your fears, overcome those that hold your back?

1. Identify your fear and have a good look at it. Is what you afraid of going to hurt you, or put you into danger? If yes, I can’t help you and you need more than this blog post can provide. (I’m not making light of your situation. I’ve been there.) If the answer is no…please continue.
2. Write down where you think these fears stem from. It could be a childhood incident. It could be more than one and is still impacting you today.
3. Work through that incident. What did you think and feel about it at the time? What was really true about it? How do you feel about it today? Write it all down.
4. What can you do to challenge yourself creatively to get yourself out of your comfort zone, and also, what can you do to play? Then go ahead and do it!
5. Do something new each week. Or it could be the same activity but stretch yourself a little more all the time. For example, the first week you may go to an art store and buy yourself some art supplies. (Or it could be the $2 shop depending on budget).  The next week you could actually draw and paint. The next week you could watch a YouTube clip and try out some of the painting or drawing techniques. Or you could check out your local Neighbourhood Learning Centre and learn rope art, or glass blowing, or sculpture.  
6. Ooo. Did I say play and have some fun.
7. Put your work out there. You never know where it can lead.

 
Valerie Khoo is now getting commissions for her rope art AND her artworks. Katrin Dreiling has just had her first book come out. It’s written by Michelle Worthington and illustrated by her. It's called, The World's Worst Pirate.

As for me, people are liking my illustrations and watching my journey. One day, I will realise my dream and write and illustrate my own picture book.               
 
 You can find out more about Julia Cameron and her book: The Artists Way
Betty Edwards has a website. Find out more here and read her book and do the exercises. It’s amazing.